Why am I Running from Cancer?

Why am I Running from Cancer?. . . check out this post for an explanation

Wednesday, November 9, 2011



Today started with temperatures in the upper 30's and rain - lots of rain.  When my alarm went off at 5:20 I laid there for a few minutes, listening . . . yup - that was rain on the roof.  I thought - Maybe it was just a drizzle . . . nope - it was raining1  ;-(  No outside run for this morning. I reset the alarm ;-)  and slept for about another hour.  Somewhere around mid-morning the rain went into a head to head fight with snow . . . with rain winning out downtown and snow winning out at my house.  The temperature has continued to drop all day.  The low for tonight is 24 - so it looks like a chilly run tomorrow morning - BUT the great news is it won't be raining  ;-)

My work has been pretty stressful lately.  Oh well - I deal with it pretty well and for the most part love my job - but sometimes !!!!!!! YIKES - I could use another vacation!  Remember I was just in Florida at the end of October and on Sunday I am flying to Miami for 3 days to attend a conference.  I plan to attend the conference - but any spare moment will be relaxing and again running outside without jackets, hats and gloves!
Besides the stresses of my job -the BIG stress that had be weighing on my mind lately has been that one of my staff was diagnosed with breast cancer in August.  She had a lumpectomy and will be undergoing chemo, starting next week.  This all just brings back way too many memories.  I was diagnosed 7 years ago and started my treatments - chemo - surgery - radiation in September 2004.  I KNOW that this is about her and her journey and her treatments . . . NOT ME - but I can't stop dredging up the fears of my journey!  Everyone . . . well not everyone, but many MANY people have been saying to me - "Oh she is so lucky to report to you . . . you understand exactly what she is going through" . . . although I do understand what she is going through -

   what happened to me
         how I dealt with cancer
               how I felt after chemo
                       how I felt about my mastectomy
                                  how I still feel about my mastectomy
                                             how I dealt with the fears
                                                       how I felt when I lost my hair
                                                               how I continue to deal with lymphedema
                                                                       how I worry about my future
Was MY Journey -  I have a hard time sharing - offering advice - . . . . it is just hard.

I have no wrap up of my comments / no "it will be OK" / no summary . . . these are just my feelings - good or bad and seeing my thoughts in black and white is part of my journey.  

Hump Day - YAHOO!


1 comment:

  1. Yes, I could use a vacation too! Let's go on a running vacation to a temperate area. I wish!